When one of the highlight of your fighting career is successfully keeping your keeping most of the hair attached to your head, it might be time to head back to Facebook and perform the fetal position there.

Shit, this girl's got an agenda. And every item on her checklist has something to do with the inner walls of her twat being treated like a clogged shower drain.

Watch her closely now, so you can tell your friends how useless she is on the next episode of Tosh.0.

For some guys this would be a dream come true. For him, it's Tuesday morning behind 7-11 after breakfast. I gotta learn some more Fresh Prince pickup lines.

Exhilarating. Now make her do this at least twice a week and mom might finally get those grand kids she's always bitching about.

Can't tell if prostitute or just a really worn out girlfriend. I guess either way it's still better than sticking your dick into a wet/dry vac. Or so I'm told...

Most guys in the car scene will cut out everything air conditioner units, to backseats in order to shave weight. No prob fuckers, these 20 lbers ride with me!

Back problems be damned - this jaw dropper has found a way keep her back feeling as good as her throat when she's snaking her tongue around a dick.

And that's why blondes always have more fun than brunettes. And more documented cases of urinary track infections.

A 110 lb female from Europe scarfing down McDonald's and then getting her fuck on in public? I'm sorry Internet, but I only believe half of those things.

Tease a self-loathing girl long enough, and results like this are guaranteed. Now for me to find a big-ass Brazilian girl with less confidence than a WoW subscriber.

Put them around your neck and you'll sleep like a baby. The world's first perfectly portable travel accessory.

Angles-only girl rips off her panties without a thought and sucks cock like it's 1999. Bet she doesn't remember the last time she had sex without cash involved.

This local drive-thru dick service is known for two things. Her tits are faker than music on a Britney Spears album, and you can only cum on her face. Bittersweet.

Combined the two of them would be a 7. And that's on a day with great lighting. Still, when it comes to unattached acts of fornication one can't be too picky.

Full shaft lubrication service wherever he wants it AND complete clean up thrown in free of charge? If this girl isn't wife material, then I don't know what the fuck is.

Doesn't look like it's slowing her down one bit though. Whatever zoo animals she's practiced on obviously prepared her for this moment.