Sunday, July 13th, 2008
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So that face is why they call the three finger thing the shocker. No wonder.
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He's just so used to the motion of bringing everything from his hand to his mouth it's hard to break the habit.
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Especially if at least one of their hands isn't holding a sandwich and has perfect clearance to land on your jaw.
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Nothing like swapping a tow truck fee for a prison term for attempted murder with an automobile. Makes a lot of sense.
Saturday, July 12th, 2008
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They are only one vodka shot away from thinking "dude it would be awesome if we could somehow get the bulb inside our body without breaking it". I just hope they bring the camera for that day too.
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Once he's done picking a redwoods worth of splinters out of his ass I bet even he will tell you the same thing.
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At least he's learning not to trust girls in any way shape or form at a young age. It should do him some good in 1st grade.
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He floated like a butterfly but got knocked the fuck out like an 80 lb kid at a kegger.
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I'm not sure who the fuck is bleeding, but I know who the fuck won't shut up.
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They need to make darker penalty cards when injuries get this bad. In his case, just throw one with a skull and crossbones on it.
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At least the walls match the inside of the shitter now. It's all about color coordination.
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His back up plan of his rainbow shirt blinding his opponent didn't work either. Poor guy.
Friday, July 11th, 2008
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I don't know what makes an individual wake up one day and want to feel the fear of drowning but I bet it has something to do with that haircut.
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Yet he is able to maintain perfect control and lane changing ability while doing this, while every girl that hears her phone ring crashes into the nearest church full of orphans. Guys rule.
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Don't mind the guy with the camera zoomed in right on you waiting for it to happen or anything. He must be there for an urban nature documentary.
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Luckily it wasn't the only head she gave that night, but at least it was the most painful.
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The one time the camera is out and the machine is open, no one is there to steal the cash. Fucking slackers.
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He has his Tae-Bo stance ready to go too. Billy Blanks, you really let this kid down.
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I don't know why they had to make absolutely sure that every bubble disappeared before going for help. Must be a Russian thing.
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Damn Europe and their beer that makes you walk slightly to the left like you have a 2x4 up your rectum.
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But once she realized Ikea was having a special on their meatballs she dropped the referee job for horrible food at great prices.
Thursday, July 10th, 2008
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Once Al Sharpton catches wind of this he is going to be wearing the skin of both their faces as a funny little hat.
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If you can't even kill yourself right then that's even more things to be emo about. The blog market must be weak in the eastern world.
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I thought bulls only charged when they saw red. Cartoons lied to me.
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Looks like it's back to wearing the bike helmet all day long again. Better make arrangements for the smaller bus too.
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This is why you have to keep those double cheeseburger wrappers out of your pockets. Beasts that big can smell you two blocks away.
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Normally I wouldn't post a video made from someone who thinks the only way to get stuff from his TV to his computer is with a camcorder, but this is worth it.
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When you wake up not knowing where you are and wondering who the hell turned you into Megaman with a beer can and some tape it really puts things into perspective.
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I guess outside of America getting pissed on is a normal occurrence.
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That's right you drunken rednecks, keep throwing your fists like that. Maybe you'll activate some hillbilly magneto power and lift him to safety.
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