Bizarre

There's only a handful of circumstances where a man's ball bag should be swollen to the size of a cheesecake. And this is not one of them.

Perhaps "glove" is the wrong term. That would indicate his hand is actually making contact with the inner walls of her dunk tank... and that's just wishful thinking.

Not even the slightest reaction that 1970 is reliving itself in her reproductive system. The sign of a girl that has experience banging guys named Jamal.

Had a homeless man walked by a took a shit on her head it would just be a normal day in the big apple. But we don't always get to see what we want.

So... why exactly are we losing the war on drugs again?

Then this one would be about a 9.7 on the shicter scale.

He sounds like Daffy Duck with Mickey Mouse shoved up his ass. I think the weed might have been laced.

It's a good thing this happened outside of America. One of you might have been forced to care.

Jet skiing in the middle east: Not even once.

You fools. Man invented hangers for a reason.

Hide and Seek Champion of 2012.

I never thought I'd live to see someone who has worse luck than THIS GUY. And I still feel that way.

Martin Luther King had a dream. If it involved wheels bigger than a fucking go kart, I'm afraid Ambien may have had a part in it.

But chances are you will.

How, exactly, in the fuck is this desirable to anyone outside of the baking industry?

Who ordered the asshole?

Not sure how I feel about this. I mean, there's not even handcuffs made out of sweet tarts on the thing. Think outside the damn box people.

The placard on each train car specifically says "No Animals". Someones getting a fucking fine. And new eyeballs for all of us.

Why are you reading this? There's blood-squirting nipples on the other side of this link.

As much as it sucks to be the person who ends up buying this couch, it will always be worse to be that guy that admitted to liking Kanye West's music. Remember that and everything will be alright.