Yum yum, and yum. Get used to three letter words because that's all you'll be able to muster up if this piece of ass decided to let you win her pussy lottery.
Yum. And might we add, "I'd drag my dick through piles of broken glass just to hear you fart through a walkie talkie" to our list of love letters sent to her email.
Chances of your penis replacing her fingers in this equation? Zero. That number is in the negatives for those of you playing Diablo 3 right now on another screen.
It's okay though - at least 90% of you don't have mouths on your dicks so talking won't be a big issue. Not like it could be heard while you choke it out anyway.
That effort looks pretty authentic on her part, but the faucet just isn't flowing today. Probably needs another 400 tokens for it to happen. Riggghhhhht.
Hot damn look at those juggernauts. If complete suffocation wasn't such a huge concern, any one of us would go for the motorboat of death in there right now.
What the fuck is any single man going to do with all that in his face? Charge friends to use them as a speedbag for starters if he cares about dat money.
Also a shame her chest has seen more plastic surgery than Joan River's asshole. (that's a lot). Her a-sized flapjacks would've been better than these fist bricks.
Her most precious body part just got turned into a street corner attraction. Oddly enough it's the only thing that really should have a tip jar next to it.
What a looker. If getting into her pants wasn't harder than getting a ticket for the fucking Avenger's this weekend we'd actually think we had a chance too.
She might as well be an Internet legend at this point. If only her last name was "Hilton" then even the mainstream could enjoy slapboxing it to those titties.
There's an episode of South Park that featured Paris Hilton. Go find it, watch the scene in Butter's bedroom, then come back to this. And masturbate furiously.
Chick is practically a skeleton and her friends think it's cute to borderline electroshok therapy her nether regions. Luckily so do we. Next up: a lawnmower.
She's completely aware of it too. Every Tom, Dick and underwear stain on the Internet is able to catch a glimpse of it if they have 100 tokens per hour to spend.
Take a good look at that expression on her face. Chances are you, and me will never see this happen in real time via penetration. I'm fappin depressed tonight.
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