Andrea Yates found not guilty by reason of batshiat insanity
HOUSTON, Texas (AP) -- Andrea Yates was found not guilty by reason of insanity Wednesday in her second murder trial for the bathtub drownings of her young children.
Saddam prefers firing squad to gallows. At least he's realistic
BAGHDAD, Iraq - A thinner but combative
Saddam Hussein said Wednesday he would rather die by firing squad like a soldier than hang "like a common criminal," as the de
America's most overpriced home markets. If you live in Santa Barbara or Naples, you're not even getting vaseline
NEW YORK (CNNMoney.com) -- After years of local home markets getting more and more overvalued, the trend has reversed, according to an analyis published this week.
Jeopardy champ Ken Jennings will take "Biting The Hand That Feeds You" for $200. Suck it long and suck it hard, Trebek
NEW YORK (AP) -- "Jeopardy!" ace Ken Jennings, who won $2.5 million during his 74-game winning streak, has a few unkind words to say about the show -- and dapper host Alex Trebek.
AT*T phone record lawsuit dismissed
CHICAGO - Citing national security, a federal judge Tuesday threw out a lawsuit aimed at blocking AT&T Inc. from giving telephone records to the government for use in the war on terror.
The cost of war
TYRE, Lebanon (CNN) -- The last time I sat down to write something, it was about the cost of war. As I looked ahead to the coming days, the last words I wrote were: Who will die?
Boy kept alive for 7 minutes underwater in hot tub by father breathing into his mouth
ORLANDO, Fla. -- A 14-year-old who was sucked to the bottom of a hotel hot tub and kept under water for at least seven minutes was likely saved by air his father breathed into his mouth during the ordeal.
Former Navy quarterback accused of rape described the encounter as "sex gone bad." If he's convicted, he'll realize what that really means
WASHINGTON - A former Naval Academy quarterback accused of rape testified Tuesday that his accuser initiated the encounter, which he described as "sex gone bad."
Ugly-ass beluga whale born at Chicago's Shedd Aquarium. Who are we kidding, he's adorable (pics)
The moment some 15 months in the making came at 5:59 p.m. Monday at the Shedd Aquarium.
From the "Who Didn't See This Coming?" Department: US Airways to place ads on its vomit bags
PHOENIX - US Airways wants to make the most out of a nauseating situation.
Rosco P. Coltrane to scan the irises of everybody pulled over in Mecklenburg County, North Carolinals. Wait, that's not right
July 24, 2006 issue - Authorities have gained a new high-tech tool to keep track of sex offenders: the Sex Offender Registry and Identification System (SORIS), a biometric database that stores images of sex offenders' irises.
Bush plays the veto card, kills stem cells. Wait, that's not right
WASHINGTON - The House on Wednesday failed to muster enough votes to override President Bush’s veto of a bill to expand federally funded embryonic stem cell research.
OPEC: Oil prices are too high and we have production capacity to spare. Reporter: Will you increase production? OPEC: Meh, maybe next week
ABUJA, Nigeria (Reuters) -- The latest spike in oil prices to near $80 a barrel is "very uncomfortable" and is hurting the world economy, the president of the Organization of the Petroleum Exporting Countries (OPEC) said on Wednesday.
Maybe Spillane didn't know too much about the finer things in writing. But he was a good man, I tell ya. Any a you mugs say otherwise gets two from my sap
CHARLESTON, S.C. -- Mickey Spillane, the macho mystery writer who wowed millions of readers with the shoot-'em-up sex and violence of gumshoe Mike Hammer, died Monday. He was 88.
Man fights off aliens to rescue girlfriend and propose to her. Theme to continue on honeymoon with anal probe
ROSWELL, N.M. - Ross Savedra fought aliens to rescue his girlfriend, then popped the question in an out-of-this-world proposal. Savedra, 32, staged his elaborate proposal Sunday afternoon for Ariana Ash, 23, with the help for family members and Roswell's UFO Museum.
NFL quarterback Byron Leftwich's Fourth of July fireworks display "was a self-indulgent spectacle celebrating one man's arrogance" according to a neighbor
JACKSONVILLE, FL -- On the playing field, tens of thousands of fans scream each time Byron Leftwich hurls a bomb downfield.
With a possibility of all-out war in the Middle East and a hurricane hitting the Gulf "Petro Coast," gas prices will hit $4.00 per gallon by Labor Day. Here comes the media scare-mongering
Experts said gasoline prices could reach record highs by Labor Day, even as crude-oil prices fell Monday, according to a report on Local 6 News.
Prestigious university has private collection of half-century-old stripper panties that they only get out on special occasions
From the land of panty vending machines and a thriving business in soiled knickers comes the news that a museum run by Japan's most prestigious private university has a collection of female stripper's undies dating back more than half a century, according to Shukan Asahi (7/21).
Blind man given "vision-enhancing drugs" so he could see his bride walk down the aisle
BLIND Andrew Hall stunned his bride when he SAW her walk up the aisle and stand with him at the altar thanks to special vision-enhancing drugs.
South Carolina lawmaker who confronted two utility workers with a pistol says it is "obscene" that he faces charges, arguing a man has the right to fire his own damn pistol into his own damn back porch
CHARLESTON, S.C. Jul 17, 2006 (AP)— A state lawmaker was arrested after his pistol fired as he confronted two utility workers checking for storm damage outside his parents' home.
PSST! Don't tell cute Polish girls that it's not fashionable to go topless; wear your underwear on the outside of your pants with a kitchen towel on your head. Pass it on. (With pic )
A model shows a design collection during the Warsaw Fashion Street in Warsaw, Poland, on Sunday, July 16, 2006.( AP Photo/Czarek Sokolowski)
Space shuttle safely lands, depriving Farkers of submitting tons of "Shuttle explodes" links
CAPE CANAVERAL, Fla. — The space shuttle Discovery dodged clouds to make a textbook touchdown here Monday, capping a 13-day mission that set the stage for resuming construction of the international space station.
Store employee arrested for poisoning church-goers by selling tainted juice, whooaah oh tainted juice, whooooah oh
STAMFORD, Conn. Jul 17, 2006 (AP)— Five months after tainted grape juice sickened more than 40 people during a church communion service, police on Monday arrested an employee of the store where the juice had been purchased.
Man killed installing washer and dryer. Widespread ban imminent
A contractor for Home Depot in Brevard County, Fla., died while installing a washer and dryer, according to a Local 6 News report.
Dog puts truck into gear and runs over woman while attempting to drive to the store to get steak
OGDEN, Utah — A police dog that was left in a pickup truck with the engine running apparently knocked the vehicle into gear and ran down a woman who was walking to her mailbox.
Crisis in the Middle East is now over. The United Nations sends a three-person diplomatic team to the region. Problem solved
(CNN) -- The United States on Thursday vetoed a U.N. Security Council resolution demanding Israel halt its attacks in Gaza.
Valerie Plame sues Cheney, Rove and Libby for conspiring to destroy her career
WASHINGTON (AP) -- The CIA officer whose identity was leaked to reporters sued Vice President Dick Cheney, his former top aide and presidential adviser Karl Rove on Thursday, accusing them and other White House officials of conspiring to destroy her career.
Man on trial for theft steals judge's keys while on trial [dumbass] tag doesn't do him justice
A 61-year-old German on trial for theft got himself into more trouble when he stole from the judge during his court hearing, police said.
Poisonous mud wreaks havoc on Java, and not the other way around for once
Poisonous mud and gas is erupting from kilometres below the earth and 8,000 people are displaced and hundreds hospitalised on the Indonesian island of Java
World collectively says awwwwwwww... schools for baby meerkats
WASHINGTON (AP) -- It is hardly algebra or physics, but meerkats have been observed actively teaching their young, something not often seen in animals in the wild.
