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Was it the sex in a public place or the fact that she's doubling up on the dick? We don't know, but one lucky janitor is going to be a very sad panda tonight.

Just in case watching Oprah has done nothing for your tolerance of women, this is a very simple way to get her to shut the hell up.

There's really no point in pulling out you shoot enough liquid to keep Smokey the bear happy anyway. Nice one hotshot.

Just like smoking crack, you're never too young to destroy a fast food establishment in the hopes of out-douchebagging another guy from your liberal arts classes.

Listen closely and you may hear the collective clapping from every man around the world the second her buttcheeks were separated. Damn.

Dude totally did that on purpose. I know, because I'm a dude.

All you friend-zoning pains in the asses out there could learn a thing or two from these females. Every once in a while you just gotta show him you care. Twice.

And boy is it fun to plant the seeds that grow them into little sluts. She could have been a respectable Playboy model. Now she's a reason to stain your pants.

That's strange. Usually getting run over by a 3,000 lb vehicle is completely unprovoked in Russia.

It also made about 3 different girls run pussy-first into Planned Parenthood the following morning. Vodka cruisers and unprotected sex don't mix all that well...

Hope that taught him a lesson. About picking on guys smaller than him, and dressing like a 1940's homosexual.

How to describe this. Take every wet dream you've had, put them together and throw Adriana Lima's pussy into... and you might be getting close.

There's only a handful of circumstances where a man's ball bag should be swollen to the size of a cheesecake. And this is not one of them.

You always wish for a pair like this to be staring you in the face at point blank range... but when it finally happens you don't know what to do. Luckily she does.

Driving without crashing into a wall is overrated anyway. That's what my Chinese ex-girlfriend used to say.

Normally when a girl is this stacked she just can't live up to the expectations when you get her in bed. But she just changed the mother fucking game.

Until I see an ad to be Tila Tequila's underwear on Craigslist, this bitch just climbed to the top of the list of shit I will never do.

Trashiness has a new face, and it's got a whole lot of red hair on it's head. Nothing short of them being in a Starbucks parking lot could make this perfect.

This dude is smooth. Real smooth. His technique? Purchasing oversized condoms and intentionally letting em slip off during intercourse.

Trust a guy you let near your butthole this often and you'll eventually regret it. Knowing half your friends jacked off to you getting pounded usually does that.

That effort looks pretty authentic on her part, but the faucet just isn't flowing today. Probably needs another 400 tokens for it to happen. Riggghhhhht.